i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
No one should have to go to work between Christmas and New Years, but here I am twirling in my office chair and putting Jack in my coffee like I’m back in college studying for finals.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
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