You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
