Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
