I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
Randomize
