Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
Randomize
