I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
So awkward... The newspaper lady just caught me sitting stoned in my driveway at 5 am and asked if I was okay. I'm way better than ok right now
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
Randomize