I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
I need a beard to bite.
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
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