I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
Randomize
