Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
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