At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
Randomize
