If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
Randomize
