Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Randomize
