i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Too bad they don't have an emoji symbol for condoms and 99 cent tacos
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
Randomize
