maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
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