I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Randomize
