Texts From Last Night

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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  is wine microwaveable?

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  (908): is wine microwaveable? http://tfl.nu/o7ks
  Replies (24) Good night (844) Bad night (5298)
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  (609): View more from New Jersey

  i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.

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  (609): i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying. http://tfl.nu/89ja
  Replies (10) Good night (3082) Bad night (726)
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  (718): View more from New York

  i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..

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  (718): i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share.. http://tfl.nu/5uhy
  Replies (11) Good night (3550) Bad night (1093)
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  (512): View more from Texas

  that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.

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  (512): that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people. http://tfl.nu/5ebd
  Replies (9) Good night (3496) Bad night (843)
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  (985): View more from Louisiana

  Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next

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  (985): Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next http://tfl.nu/7632
  Replies (9) Good night (951) Bad night (3714)
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  (770): View more from Georgia

  Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.

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  (770): Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out. http://tfl.nu/a31o
  Replies (12) Good night (5013) Bad night (832)
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  (519): View more from Ontario

  I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.

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  (519): I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore. http://tfl.nu/9p2a
  Replies (4) Good night (1283) Bad night (788)
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  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..

  (587): View more from Alberta

  Wow. We're meant to be..

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  (403): I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask.. (587): Wow. We're meant to be.. http://tfl.nu/3d3s
  Replies (13) Good night (2590) Bad night (564)
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  (224): View more from Illinois

  Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?

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  (224): Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right? http://tfl.nu/9x3c
  Replies (1) Good night (1069) Bad night (394)
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  (315): View more from New York

  What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?

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  (315): What's a good pandora station to masturbate to? http://tfl.nu/c2un
  Replies (8) Good night (551) Bad night (956)
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  (973): View more from New Jersey

  Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see

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  (973): Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see http://tfl.nu/gnrw
  Replies (5) Good night (1077) Bad night (845)
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  (916): View more from California

  I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.

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  (916): I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions. http://tfl.nu/tje6
  Replies (4) Good night (672) Bad night (499)
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  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.

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  (724): Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though. http://tfl.nu/whvr
  Replies (2) Good night (810) Bad night (296)
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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  I think I just cured my dogs munchies

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  (908): I think I just cured my dogs munchies http://tfl.nu/38nb
  Replies (1) Good night (350) Bad night (223)
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  (406): View more from Montana

  Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.

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  (406): Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row. http://tfl.nu/j0up
  Replies (2) Good night (524) Bad night (170)

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