Texts From Last Night

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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.

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  (215): Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous (610): Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference. http://tfl.nu/p378
  Replies (13) Good night (2245) Bad night (783)
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  (270): View more from Kentucky

  I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.

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  (270): I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song. http://tfl.nu/5506
  Replies (14) Good night (3288) Bad night (919)
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.

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  (503): well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride. http://tfl.nu/51rz
  Replies (22) Good night (5842) Bad night (613)
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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  a fat lady just tried to bring a cooler stuffed full with burger kid through airport security. christ I'm going to miss the midwest.

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  (612): a fat lady just tried to bring a cooler stuffed full with burger kid through airport security. christ I'm going to miss the midwest. http://tfl.nu/dtsn
  Replies (40) Good night (3849) Bad night (931)
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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"

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  (603): sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!" http://tfl.nu/halh
  Replies (7) Good night (1504) Bad night (4030)
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  (757): View more from Virginia

  I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.

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  (757): I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it. http://tfl.nu/uqxt
  Replies (13) Good night (9838) Bad night (1951)
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  (519): View more from Ontario

  we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"

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  (519): we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault" http://tfl.nu/rtah
  Replies (7) Good night (4878) Bad night (1076)
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  (954): View more from Florida

  Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.

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  (954): Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers. http://tfl.nu/re05
  Replies (3) Good night (3751) Bad night (945)
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  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.

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  (401): I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard. http://tfl.nu/cjsq
  Replies (9) Good night (2863) Bad night (935)
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  (301): View more from Maryland

  Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often

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  (301): Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often http://tfl.nu/2a6o
  Replies (8) Good night (1825) Bad night (631)
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  (518): View more from New York

  Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play

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  (518): Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play http://tfl.nu/j01d
  Replies (10) Good night (1732) Bad night (761)
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  (480): View more from Arizona

  So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?

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  (480): So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast? http://tfl.nu/qa47
  Replies (3) Good night (1131) Bad night (660)
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  (281): View more from Texas

  You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"

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  (281): You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike" http://tfl.nu/m449
  Replies (1) Good night (1379) Bad night (500)
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  (519): View more from Ontario

  How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things

  (1-519): View more from Ontario

  I felt like I was at the zoo

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  (519): How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things (1-519): I felt like I was at the zoo http://tfl.nu/xxq9
  Replies (0) Good night (814) Bad night (271)
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.

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  (732): I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere. http://tfl.nu/0401
  Replies (2) Good night (833) Bad night (210)

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