So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
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So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
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We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.