Taylor Swift is so right about you.
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Randomize
