Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
Randomize
