Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
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