i wonder why nobody wants to date me...im doing a crossword at work and asked out loud: whats a 4 letter word for 'a reason to get married?'
i was like PREG?
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
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