I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
Randomize
