i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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