it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
why is half of my head shaved?
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