are you so shy because you have an std?
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
Randomize
