Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
Randomize
