I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
Wait. Did you let me snort wine last night cause I wanted to smell jesus's blood?
Yes. I have pictures. Your soul is mine.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
Randomize
