Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
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