Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
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