I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
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