No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
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