Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
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