found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
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