Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
Randomize