i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
Randomize
