I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
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