okay pat passed out under dana's car
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
I will be naked everywhere
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
i've created a new STD.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
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