Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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