just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
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