Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Randomize
