If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
Randomize