Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
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