Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
I felt like helen keller
But she could have totally found that shit before me
youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
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