You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
