I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
and the officer said have you been drinking
and i said NOO SIR.
and he said, I am a woman.
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
Randomize