i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
I was just giving a mobile app demo to a client, on my iPhone, when a reminder alert appeared across the page blinking "12pm: go home and give John head". You're an asshole
Hahaha oops.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
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