The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
No more Irish car bombs ever.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
Randomize
