you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
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