I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
Hello my rib-scented angel!
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
Randomize
