Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
Randomize
