I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Randomize
