Banned from zoo.
Again?
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
Randomize
